


The Lie

by ringading



Category: Ylvis
Genre: Angst, BabyYlvis, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Lies, Talkshow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-06
Updated: 2015-03-11
Packaged: 2018-03-10 17:00:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3297767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ringading/pseuds/ringading
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The screen flickered briefly, and then his brother's face appeared, staring right into the camera. His voice sounded loud and clear. </p><p>"Hi, this is Bård  Ylvisåker.  I have not so much of a request as an encouragement to my brother.  It's hard for men to talk about things that are difficult, but I know you've been keeping a secret from your own mother for many, many years.  A secret that involves a bus pass, some masked men and even the police to a certain extent, so I was thinking I would help you and push you in the right direction.  I'm sure our mother who is watching this, is wondering now, so come out with it now.  Get it off your heart, let it out, tell us the real truth of what happened that day at the bus stop."</p><p>EDIT:  I first wrote this in two chapters, ending with the talkshow, thinking that certain things were better left to our imagination.  But I've been unable to stop thinking about it, and finally I just had to write the final chapter.  So here it is - all the confrontations!  Phew!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> By the time this happened, the general age for starting school in Norway was 7 years old, so Bård, being 6 years old at the time, had not yet started school and would be at home.  
> (Now, Norwegian kids start school at age 6.)

"Vegard Ylvisåker," the talkshow host said with a grin, "we have received a request for you from one of our viewers."

"Okay," Vegard said, smiling. "I'm ready."

The screen flickered briefly, and then his brother's face appeared, staring right into the camera. His voice sounded loud and clear.

"Hi, this is Bård Ylvisåker. I have not so much of a request as an encouragement to my brother. It's hard for men to talk about things that are difficult, but I know you've been keeping a secret from your own mother for many, many years. A secret that involves a bus pass, some masked men and even the police to a certain extent, so I was thinking I would help you and push you in the right direction. I'm sure our mother who is watching this, is wondering now, so come out with it now. Get it off your heart, let it out, tell us the real truth of what happened that day at the bus stop."

At first Vegard just stared at his brother's fading picture on the screen in disbelief, but then the memory of the incident hit him in the face and he blushed furiously, hiding his face akwardly in his hand and shaking his head. "Nooo..."

"Come on," the host said encouragingly, "your brother told us this much, so now you simply have to tell us the rest."

Vegard just couldn't believe Bård had revealed his deep secret like that, and on national television to boot, and just gaped at the host. Then his survival instinct kicked in, and he tried to laugh it off, but the laugh was strained and harsh, and got stuck in his throat. There was no way he could escape from this now.

"Bloody hell, huh?" His smile faltered, as he began remembering the day in earnest.

 

**************

 

"Bård, don't play with your food! Put it in your mouth instead of in your milk!" Mom looked exasperated at her youngest son who showed no interest in eating his food. "And try to drink some of the milk too, it's good for you!"

"Don't wanna, it makes my tummy hurt," the six-year-old boy muttered unenthusiastically, and continued crumbling pieces of bread into his milk glass.

Nine-year-old Vegard chewed the last piece of his bread and emptied his glass before rising from the table. Mom turned to look at him.

"You'd better hurry," she said, removing the bread filled glass from Bård's reach and stood up. She opened the fridge and took out Vegard's lunch box and a drinking bottle and stuffed them in his backpack , while he put his jacket and shoes on. "You don't want to have to run for the bus like you did yesterday," she admonished, helping him to get the pack onto his shoulders.

"No, mom, I won't," he replied automatically as he opened the door and walked out. Mom could be so fuzzy sometimes. He waved half-heartedly to her and Bård who peeked out behind her, as he started to walk.

It wasn't that far to the bus stop, just down the hill, but there were a lot of trees, so the bus stop wasn't visible from any of the scattered houses around. When he reached it, Vegard still had a couple of minutes until the bus was due, so he stuck his hand in the pocket of his jacket to get the bus pass. It wasn't there. He searched his other pocket. Nothing. And not in the pockets of his jeans. Now, Vegard was getting a little nervous, and took his backpack off to search it. There was no bus card in the front pocket of his pack, no card in the inner pocket, it was not in the main room and not in his pencil case. Where could it be? Had he lost it?

Quickly he leafed through his school books, nothing there. Just then the bus was coming up the road and Vegard's pulse started pounding. What should he do? The bus stopped for him and opened the door, and hesitantly the young boy entered the bus with the opened backpack in his hand.

"I don't have my bus pass today... but can I still ride?" he asked anxiously.

The bus driver looked sourly at him. "Then you must buy a ticket."

"But I don't have any money," Vegard replied quietly.

"Then you can't ride," the driver said curtly.

"But... but... I have to go to school now," the boy pleaded shakingly, but the man was unrelenting.

"That doesn't matter. No ticket, no ride. You'll have to leave the bus!" The driver was getting impatient now and gave Vegard an angry stare, gesturing at the open door with his hand.

The boy stared uhappily at the driver, his mouth opening and closing but no words came out. Instead he bent his head in defeat, turned around and left the bus. The door closed immediately after him and the bus drove off.

Vegard stood despondently at the stop, watching the bus disappearing among the trees. He felt close to tears. Mom would be so angry if he got late for school. What was he to do ? The lump in his throat grew larger and larger, and he sunk down on his knees next to the backpack. Desperately he emptied out the pack on the dusty ground and frantically pawed through everything again. By the time he had searched all his pockets and belongings for the third time, large, heavy tears were rolling down his face. The bus pass was nowhere to be found. There was nothing more he could do but to return home with his tail between his legs. Sobbing, the dark haired boy scooped his books back in his backpack and shouldered it. Slowly he began the climb back up the hill again, his eyes darting back and forth on the road as he went, just in case he had lost his pass on the way there, but he knew inside that it wouldn't be there.

_'I've never been late for school before... mom will get so angry... she will yell at me and scold me, and maybe she'll even lock me in my room... and what will my teacher do? Maybe she'll call mom and be angry too? And where is my pass? Maybe I can never take the bus again?'_

The thoughts kept rushing through his head as he very slowly trotted up the hill. Never had the short distance taken so long, but still it felt way too fast. Already he stood on the steps, and he still didn't know what to tell mom. How could he explain that he had lost the precious bus pass?

He hesitated, not wanting to go inside, but mom saw him from the kitchen window and hastily opened the door. She stared in shock at her son standing there with dirty clothes and hands, and his face full of snot and tears.

"What has happened?" she asked anxiously, pulling him inside. "Why aren't you on the bus? And why are you crying?"

"I... I couldn't take the bus," he sniffled, trying to stop the sobs.

"But why not?"

"I... didn't ... have the bus pass..."

"You didn't have your buss pass? Where is it? Did you lose it?" Mom's voice suddenly sounded louder, shriller, and Vegard shivered.

"No... somebody took it." His mouth said the lie before his brain even had time to process it.

Mom's eyes grew larger. "Who took it?"

"Some big boys." Vegard stared down on his feet. He couldn't face mom now that he was lying to her.

"But.. how could they take it?" Mom knelt down to wipe the tears from his face, and searched for his eyes which wouldn't meet hers.

"I ... I had it in my hand... and they started pushing me... and then they took my card just to be mean..." The boy still stared at his feet, and his heart was pounding loudly. Maybe mom wouldn't get mad at him after all, if he managed to blame some unknown bullies?

"But who were they? Did you recognize them?"

"No... they were wearing ski masks..."

"Ski masks?" Mom's voice was shocked and she stood up abruptly. "They were masked? And they robbed you?"

 _'Oh you idiot, now you've done it!'_ Vegard berated himself. He hadn't intended to make it sound this serious... but now it was too late to turn around.

"Yes," he nodded, biting his teeth together. His heart thudded so violently that it felt like it was ready to jump out of his ears, and he closed his eyes tightly. Now that he had started lying, he had to continue doing it, or mom would get even madder.

"Oh poor baby," mom said soothingly and took his jacket and shoes off. "Come with me and let me wash you up. Did they hit you?" She took his hand and led him into the kitchen where she wet a clean towel and began washing his face and hands.

"Noo, they just pushed me," Vegard said tentatively , wishing for the interrogation to be over.

Bård had been sitting in the living room watching tv, but when he heard voices from the kitchen he came padding over.

"Why is Vegard back?" he asked curiously, sticking his thumb in his mouth.

"Vegard isn't going to school today, honey," mom said in a light voice, not wanting to upset the little one.

"Okay. Can he watch tv with me?"

"Sure he can. He'll just change his dirty clothes first."

With that, Bård was satisfied and padded back to the living room, while mom took Vegard upstairs to change clothes.

"I will have to talk to your father about this," mom said as they were coming downstairs again. "Go in and watch tv with Bård. We'll figure out how to deal with this."

Vegard nodded, feeling a bit better now that she didn't seem to be angry, but he still felt anxious of what she would tell dad. Still, he crawled up onto the couch where Bård was sitting, watching cartoons, and pretty soon began to forget his anxiety.

 

\----

 

"Yes, he was attacked at the bus stop. Masked men. Ski masks."

Vegard's ears perked up when he heard mom's voice from the kitchen. She was talking to someone on the phone.

"They beat him up and took his pass. I'm afraid! Masked robbers, here in our neighbourhood!" Mom's voice sounded shrill and upset, and Vegard felt the heavy knot returning to his tummy.

"School... the headmaster... yes, I'll do that. When are you coming home?" The voice lowered into a murmur and Vegard couldn't hear anymore, but he had lost all interest in the cartoon. Why had he been so stupid to tell mom that lie?

Shortly after, mom returned to the living room, looking determined.

"Bård, Vegard, come here and put your clothes on. We're going for a drive."

"But we're watching tv!" Bård whined.

"I know, honey, but we have some things to do, and I can't leave you home alone."

"But mom! Vegard can stay with me!"

"No, Vegard has things to do too, so you must both come."

Vegard felt a sense of dread wash over him. "Where are we going?"

"We are going to the school to talk with the headmaster. Come on now, be quick!"

The knot in Vegard's stomach suddenly felt double the weight as he slowly climbed down from the couch and made his way over to their clothes. Mom was already dressing Bård and Vegard put first his jacket on, then his shoes, slowly, slowly, hoping to drag this out as much as possible. The idea of having to talk to the headmaster frightened him terribly, and by the time they were all dressed, he was on the verge of tears again.

Bård gazed up at his bigger brother with clear, blue eyes, frowning when he saw the tears in his brother's eyes.

"Mom, Vegard is sad," he said and took his hand in both of his own. Even though he was used to Vegard taking care of him, he felt an urge to take care of his bigger brother now. Something was wrong and he didn't want Vegard to cry.

"It's okay, dear," mom said and gave Vegard a hug. "We're just going to notify the headmaster about those that took your bus card. You don't need to be afraid."

Vegard sniffled and dried his eyes to show mom that he was a good boy, but the dread in his heart just grew bigger by the second. If mom only knew it was a lie... but how could he tell her now? After all this? She would get so very, very angry... He sniffled again, but managed to hold back his tears while they got into the car.

Mom drove faster than usual down to the school, and Vegard's anxiety grew even more when he saw the familiar buildings approaching. They parked outside the building, and mom told Bård to stay in the car while she and Vegard went in.

"Nooo!" Bård protested, tears already welling up in his eyes. "I don't wanna be alone! No! Don't leave me!" He began crying loudly, and mom looked exasperated. In the end she decided to let him come too. Immediately the crying stopped, and Bård sent Vegard a big, tear-glittering smile.

"I'm going to see your school!" he chanted triumfantly and jumped out of the car.

Vegard almost had to smile at Bård's blatant manipulation. Even as young as his little brother was, he knew how to play mum around his little finger to get what he wanted. With Bård happily bouncing between them, they passed through the door and walked down the corridoor.

Vegard could see the headmaster's door at the end of it, like a big square of doom coming closer and closer. He was terrified of the idea of having to lie to the headmaster too. Sooner or later it would be discovered that it was all a lie - his lie - and the results would be disastrous. He wanted out; away from the lie, away from all of this, he wanted home, in bed.

The headmaster's door was relentlessly coming closer, and Vegard's stomach churned. He felt nauseous. Just as mom lifted her hand to knock, Vegard gagged, and mom lowered her hand and looked worried at him.

"Are you feeling sick, honey?"

"A little," Vegard groaned. "Do we really have to talk to the headmaster?"

"We do," mom said, frowning as she eyed him. Wasn't he looking pale? Maybe it hadn't been such a good idea to drag him here when he was still suffering from the trauma?

"Maybe you and Bård can sit in the reception with the secretary while I talk to him," she suggested. "Then you won't have to explain everything all over again."

Vegard looked gratefully up at her, and mom lifted her hand again and knocked.

They entered the reception, which was a small room filled with bookshelves and cupboards. Along one wall was a long bench, and on the opposite wall - facing them - was a cluttered desk with a typewriter and a telephone, and a grey-haired woman sitting behind it. Beside her was the door that led to the headmaster... Vegard tried not to look at it.

Mom told Bård and Vegard to sit on the bench and wait while she talked to the secretary, and after a short while she was let in the door. Vegard sat kicking on the bench leg, unable to keep his feet still. His hands too, constantly fiddling with the hem of his jacket, his zipper, the buttons, trying everything to avert his attention from the sickening weight in his stomach.

Suddenly the door opened, and mom peeked out.

"Vegard, would you please come in, just for a moment?" She looked apologeticly at him. "Bård, just sit here. It will only take a couple of minutes."

Bård looked like he was going to cry, but the secretary came to his resque.

"Look here, young man," she said to him with a smile. "I have a box here with old toys, would you like to help me sorting them out?" Bård lit up and ran over to the box, mom and Vegard already forgotten.

Mom nodded smiling to the secretary and led Vegard inside, closing the door behind them.

Vegard had never been to the headmaster's office before, and stood dumbstruck by the door, staring at the huge shiny desk and the big man behind it. He had big, round cheeks and a large double chin and a big belly, and resembled a big, fat, scary toad. On the wall behind him were flags, diplomas, a cupboard filled with medals and silver cups, and above his head were many photos of stern men staring down at him from their frames.

The headmaster looked stern too, and everything in that room looked so intimidating that Vegard almost couldn't breathe. Mom told him to come and sit down in the chair in front of the desk, but Vegard couldn't move. He felt like he would pee his pants, or be sick, or perhaps faint - whatever would happen first.

Mom took his arm and led him gently over to the chair and sat him down, while she remained standing next to him. Vegard looked up at the large man and all the scary faces above him who were all staring at him, and fought the rapidly increasing nausea.

"Hello, Vegard," the man said. "Your mom tells me that you were robbed by a couple of masked men at the bus stop today. Could you please try to remember anything about how they looked?"

There it was again, the lie. It was already in the room before he even came in, having grown to unthinkable proportions. There was no way he could reverse it now, it stood like a massive wall between him and everybody else. There was no way around it and no way through it. No escape whatsoever.

Vegard couldn't speak, he couldn't even breathe. All he managed to do was a slow shaking of his head.

"Please honey, try to remember," mom encouraged, placing an arm supportingly around his shoulder. But Vegard couldn't continue the lie... he just couldn't. The walls with all the angry faces came closing in on him and he felt like he was going to explode with guilt and shame and desperation. Tears began streaming down his cheeks, and - unable to breathe properly - he gasped and hiccuped and started to hyperventilate. Still, he felt like suffocating; he simply couldn't get enough air.

Mom looked shocked and bent down to comfort her son. "I'm sorry," she told the headmaster, "but he is still traumatized. I'm afraid this is too much for him."

"I understand," the headmaster said sympathetically, "you'd better take him home. We will notify all parents. And remember what I said about alerting the police."

The word Police was too much for Vegard. His vision began to fade into black, and he fell soundlessly to the floor.

When he woke up again, he was laying on the bench in the reception, and Bård and the secretary were staring worriedly at him. Mom was kneeling beside him holding a wet tissue to his forehead.

"Mom, Vegard is awake!" Bård's eager voice cut into the dizzyness that was clouding his brain.

"Oh good," mom said. "How are you feeling, honey? Can you sit up?"

"Uhh... I feel sick and dizzy," he groaned and gagged. The nausea was unbearable. "Uhh..." Suddenly he lunged forwards and threw up violently into the waste basket the secretary had hurriedly grabbed. Bård wailed in disgust.

"Oh dear." Mom held his shoulders to support him through it, and then wiped his mouth with the wet tissue. "I'm so sorry about this," she said to the secretary.

"Oh that's okay," the secretary said. "It's not the first time this happens. You wouldn't believe all the things I've seen in here." She eyed the dark haired boy anxiously. "Should we take him to the nurse?"

"No, I think what he needs most is to come home and get to bed," mom said after a pause. "Are you able to stand up now, Vegard?"

Vegard was still shaky and dizzy, but above all he wanted out of that stiffling room, so with mom's help he managed to get on his feet and wobbled to the door.

The drive home was torture. Bård chattered on and on about how Vegard had looked when he was carried out of the headmaster's office and everything that had happened after that, while Vegard sat with closed eyes and tried to shut the noise out. The word Police was churning around in his head. Mom wanted to call the police, and they would certainly find out that he had lied. Various terrifying scenarios with the police played out in his head and mixed with the endless chatter from his brother until he thought he would go crazy.

"Shut up!" he suddenly yelled to Bård, who was in the middle of a long explanation about the toys in the secretary's box. The little boy stopped abruptly and stared at his older brother, his lower lip starting to shiver.

"Mo-om," Bård whimpered tearfully, "Vegard said.."

"I heard it," mom replied, as she drove up to their front door. "Vegard, tell your brother you're sorry."

"Sorry," Vegard muttered and opened the door. Getting out in the fresh air helped a little, but not much. He felt weary to the bone of everything. All he wanted was to get away from the lie for a while, to forget it, to get some time off. He didn't want to talk to anybody, see anybody or have to listen to anybody, not even his brother - he just wanted peace.

The moment they came in the door, Vegard kicked his shoes off, tossed his jacket on the floor and went upstairs, slamming the door to his room. Once he was inside, he let himself fall down on the bed, totally exhausted. In two minutes, he was asleep.

Bård stood at the foot of the stairs, staring in surprise after his disappearing brother, and then at mom. "What's wrong with him?"

"Vegard has had a tough time today, and he is a little bit sick. He needs to rest for a while," mom replied, although she looked a bit worried.

After a few minutes, she snuck upstairs and quietly opened the door to Vegard's room. When she saw her son laying sprawled out on top of the duvet, sleeping, she closed the door silently and went downstairs to call her husband again, to tell him what had happened.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

After a few hours, Vegard woke up to somebody shaking his shoulder. "Vegard, wake up," mom's voice was soft. "How are you feeling?"

Slowly he opened his eyes. Sleeping had helped him pull himself together, and the events of the day seemed a little further away. "I'm hungry and I need to pee," he said.

"That's good," mom smiled. "Go to the bathroom and then come downstairs. Dinner is just ready, and dad is home." Vegard nodded obediently and hurried out of bed, while mom went downstairs.

Dad didn't say much to him while they ate, but Vegard felt his eyes on him all through the meal. Although he had felt hungry, he couldn't eat much, so he mostly pushed the food around on his plate with the fork.

"Vegard, you should try to eat some," mom said with a concerned expression. "You haven't eaten all day."

"Yes, eat up now. You'll need your strength when the police comes." Dad added.

Vegard startled and stared in shock at his father. "The police?" Had they discovered that he'd been lying? Were they coming to arrest him? His eyes grew huge in fright and the fork fell out of his shaking hand and landed on the plate with a clatter.

"Don't worry," dad said, "they just need to ask you a few questions about what happened today. They should be here soon."

Everything that had happened during the day came crashing back to him, and Vegard couldn't eat another bite. Just looking at the food made him feel sick. He quickly excused himself and went into the living room where the tv was still on, blaring colourful noisy cartoons. Bård came padding after him and crawled up in the couch next to him.

"I'm not hungry either," the little boy said in a companionable tone and moved tightly up to his brother, clutching his hand. He didn't understand what was wrong with his elder brother, but he knew he wasn't okay, and felt a need to comfort him.

Bård's closeness felt comforting to Vegard, and he hugged his hand back. But that was all he had time for, because now everybody could hear a car driving up and stopping outside the house.

"Here's the police now," dad said to mom. "Why don't you go with Bård upstairs, and I'll stay here with Vegard."

Both boys ran to the window to stare at the police car, but Bård was unceremoniously picked up by mom. "Come on now, honey, we'll go upstairs and leave dad to take care of this," she told him and walked towards the stairs.

"Noo, I wanna see the police!" Bård wailed and started to kick. But mom was unrelenting.

"You can watch the police from the bedroom window," she told him and carried him upstairs in strong arms.

Vegard watched through the window as a policeman in black uniform came out of the car and walked up to the front door, where dad was waiting. He had never seen a policeman this close before, and it was a terrifying sight. Black boots, black trousers with white bands, black leather jacket with gold lions and the word POLITI written on it, and a black cap with another gold lion on it. He was very tall too, even taller than dad, and Vegard watched him with a combination of fascination and dread. The police had detectives and investigators, and they were certain to find out if he lied to them. Maybe they would even arrest him?

The policeman and dad talked briefly on the stairs in serious voices before they both came inside, and Vegard was called into the living room. He was told to sit on the couch next to dad, and the policeman sat down on a chair right opposite of him. By now, the dread was a heavy rock in his stomach and he wished he could sink through the floor and disappear. Dad had to notice that he was shaking, because he placed his hand encouraginly on his son's shoulder.

"Now, Vegard," the policeman began, picking a notepad and a pen up from his chest pocket and leafing through it until he found an empty page. "We've been told that you had an unpleasant meeting with some masked men at the bus stop today. Tell us exactly what happened this morning."

The policeman stared right at Vegard with steely grey eyes, which seemed to pierce into his very soul. It seemed impossible to continue the lie in front of those eyes, but it was already too late. The lie was already there, in place, like a huge wall between him and the others in the room.

Vegard had no choice. With a shaking voice he began the same explanation as he had told his mother this morning. The policeman listened intently, and scribbled down on his notepad every word Vegard said. Sometimes he asked additional questions about what the men had done, how they spoke, what they looked like, colours on clothes and other details, and Vegard had to wring his brain to invent even more lies to satisfy those piercing steel grey eyes.

They all were a part of the lie now, mom, dad, the school, the police, everybody believed it and continued talking about it. The lie was living it's own life now, way beyond Vegard's control. It had become a monster. Everywhere he turned, the lie was there, glaring at him, and he had to continue lying to keep it at bay. It had gone way too far. Any attempts to stop the lie at this point would have disastrous results.

Vegard felt like his brain was running on auto-pilot. He was too exhausted to even think anymore, and he could hardly breathe. There was no air left between him and those piercing eyes, and he heard dad's voice from far away, like he was inside a glass bowl. Dad seemed to say something about investigation, about finding the robbers, about being shocked that robbers would be in this friendly neighbourhood, attacking small children. Vegard couldn't really make out much more of what was being said, except that dad sounded upset and the policeman tried to calm him.

His pulse was pounding so violently that he felt it in his entire body, in his ears, in his throat, in his stomach, he was nauseous, shaking violently and gasping for air. All he wanted was to get away from those grey eyes and the horrible, horrible lie. Finally dad seemed to pick up on how uncomfortable his son was, and stood up, bidding the policeman to follow him outside.

When those piercing eyes finally moved away, Vegard felt it physically like a tight rope finally was severed. He fell forwards on his knees on the floor and vomited.

Mom, who had seen the policeman leave, was just coming down the stairs, and she rushed to his side to help him. Vegard was laid down on the couch, given water to drink and a blanket over him. He faintly noticed that he was crying, at least he heard someone sobbing, and his face was all wet. Both mom and dad tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't respond, couldn't respond. It was all too much for him, and his brain simply blocked everything out.

The next thing he noticed was that he was carried upstairs in his dad's strong arms, and placed in his bed. Mom and dad were talking in hushed voices around him, but he could make out words like 'seriously traumatized', 'protection', 'must be shielded', and 'never subject him to more of this'.

Then, his clothes were removed and he was dressed in his pyjamas, given another glass of water, and told to try to sleep. Mom and dad left the room, and Vegard was left alone in the dark. At least he thought he was, until he felt a small body quietly climbing up in his bed and crawling under the duvet with him.

Bård was the only one he hadn't lied to. The only one he didn't need to be afraid of. The only one he could feel safe with. The only one that could remain on the inside of the wall of lies with him, when everyone else were on the outside. That felt good. Vegard sighed contently when he felt small arms embracing him as Bård cuddled close, and he wrapped his arms around his little brother and buried his face down in his hair, which smelled warm and sweet and uniquely Bård. Finally Vegard could relax, and they both fell asleep.

 

************

 

Many years later, in the dressing room after a show, Bård brought it up.

"I've always wondered what happened to you that day the police came," he said. "Mom has told me that Vegard had such a nasty experience when he was nine, and that we were never to talk about it, because it would hurt you. But I've been dying to know what happened. Did you find a dead body or something?" Bård's blue eyes glittered as he smiled towards his older brother.

"Oh, did they really say that?" Vegard suddenly felt a faint shadow of that surging panic anxiety he had suffered that day so long ago. "I didn't know they even told you... really, it was nothing."

"Well it must have been," Bård mused, "for mom to say it like that. Please, tell me."

Vegard sighed. "I will, if you promise never to tell anybody."

"Nobody at all? Why?"

"Because what really happened is a secret I've never told anybody."

"Ok, I promise, Vegard. Tell me!"

"Allright then. It started when I was waiting for the bus to school, and I discovered I had lost my bus pass. I couldn't find it anywhere. So when the bus came, they wouldn't let me ride, so I had to go home again. And I was so terrified mom would get angry at me, that I invented a story..."

After he had told him everything, Bård stared at him with huge eyes. "Holy shit! That was really some tough shit you were going through, although not in the way mom and dad thought you were. Did you ever tell them the truth?"

"No, you're the very first one. And I still feel bad about it, so I don't want you to tell anybody, ever. Mom and dad must _never_ learn the truth. Promise me that!"

"Cross my heart and hope to die," Bård said with an honest expression. "I swear!"

 

****************

 

Wow, that was some story!" the talkshow host exclaimed with a big smile. It had really turned out much better than expected when he had gotten Bård Ylvisåker to rat out his brother. Getting Vegard Ylvisåker to come out on tv with a deep, dark secret would make his ratings skyrocket. "Why did you never tell them what really happened?"

Vegard hid his face in his hands in shame and shook his head.

"No... I've always been so ashamed of the whole thing. And then that fucking idiot comes and tells it all! That hurts!" He spat angrily with clenched teeth in the direction of the video screen where Bård's face had disappeared long ago.

"So your mother...?"

"She doesn't know!"

"How do you think she will take it?" The host couldn't keep the wide grin off of his face. This was gold.

"I don't know. I really don't know. This is totally..." Vegard shook his head in exasperation. He didn't even dare to think of the reactions this news would gain from his parents.

"How does it feel to finally come clean with it?" the host asked with fake sympathy.

Vegard rubbed his face. The entire thing had hurt him a lot more than he would ever admit on tv. Bård had broken his promise and forced him to revive the whole thing that he had buried so deep down that he had hoped it would never see the light of day again. All the emotions and all the anxiety had surfaced again, and he was having a hard time trying to get it under control again - and this was even on television! His eyes stung, and he had to wipe his eyes to stop the tears from running down his cheeks.

The host watched his guest with undisguised glee. "Are you crying now?"

"No! I just got something in my eye!" Vegard tried to joke it away with a fake laughter. "I never cry!"

"No, of course," the host repeated with a mock expression in his face. "You never cry."

 

*********

 

The phone rang in the middle of the night. Bård woke up with a start. Who in heavens name would call him at this hour? He put the phone to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Bård, you fucking idiot! I should have known that you couldn't keep a secret!!"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The talkshow mentioned is this one:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLVbfxI2GxI


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think that this happened around the time when Vegard moved to Oslo, but since the talkshow took place in Bergen, I'm assuming that he spent a few days there to arrange stuff regarding his house before going back to Oslo again. 
> 
> This chapter starts just where the last one ended, so I'd advice you to read the previous chapter first.

\--------------------------

The phone rang in the middle of the night. Bård woke up with a start.  Who in heavens name would call him at this hour?  He put the phone to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Bård, you fucking idiot!  I should have known that you couldn't keep a secret!"

"Uh... Vegard?"

"What the hell were you thinking!"  Vegard was so angry that he spat into the phone.

"Uhm.. I.. " Bård struggled to make his brain wake up. "What is this about?"

"You know very well what I'm talking about," Vegard shouted. "The bus pass thing. You knew I was doing that talkshow tonight!"

"Oh that." Now Bård remembered, and he smiled to himself. "Got you good, didn't I?"

"Damn it, Bård! Don't you laugh at me! Why did you do it?" Vegard was yelling now, all his emotions turning into anger at the person who had subjected him to this humiliation.

The yelling was so loud that Bård had to remove the phone from his ear. He stared disapprovingly at the device for a moment before putting it back to his ear.

"I can't talk to you if you keep screaming in my ear like that," he complained.

"If you weren't way back in Oslo, I would do a lot more than screaming!" Vegard was tempted to throw the phone at the wall in his anger, but realized in time that breaking his phone wouldn't exactly help things.

"You promised me you wouldn't tell anyone," he continued between clenched teeth. "You lied! You betrayed my trust! Why?"

"Didn't I say so on the video?" the younger brother asked and shrugged. "You have held it hidden long enough, so it was time to come out with it."

"That should have been by my own choice and not by yours! And certainly not on national television!" Vegard was so angry that his voice cracked, and he had to stop to get it under control again.

Bård was beginning to feel a bit uncomfortable now. The idea of making Vegard squirm had been great fun, especially as they were in different cities so his brother couldn't get at him, but he had intended it to be a joke - a fun prank. Something they could laugh at. Vegard's reaction was a lot stronger than Bård had expected, and that gave him pause.

"Look," he tried in his most calming voice, "they called me and asked me if I had some interesting story to share about you, something that nobody knew. To give them a more personal inkling to the interview. It was supposed to be a prank... nothing to get so upset about."

"A prank? A PRANK?!" His brother's voice was just a high pitched whine, and Bård had to remove the phone from his ear again.

This time Vegard did throw his phone, but luckily it bounced on his bed and landed on a pillow. He sat and stared at it, blindly, wiping angrily at the unwanted tears that came to his eyes. Bård's voice was coming out of the phone, hardly audible, but Vegard didn't care anymore. He was overcome with emotions he couldn't control; the pain of having to go through it all again, the shame of having to talk about it on television, the feeling of betrayal, and the anger at his brother.

He pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes to stop the tears, and breathed shakily. Gradually he realized that the anger was just as much directed towards himself for reacting so strongly. Bård had triggered it, but it was himself who had allowed the old thing to fester and grow so big inside of him that it had to come to this... meltdown.

"Vegard! Vegard! Are you still there?" Bård shouted into the phone but got no reply. His brother hadn't hung up, he could still hear some faint sounds at the other end, but it was hard to make out. It resembled heavy breathing... or sobs?

"Vegard! Please pick up!" Bård tried again, feeling his stomach churning with guilt. He had never intended for it to turn this bad... the stupid thing must have hurt his brother much more than he thought. What had he done?

The phone on his pillow continued shouting at him, and after a while Vegard lifted his face from his hands and glared at it. Why was Bård still there? In the end he reached out and grabbed the offending thing and barked into it.

"What do you want? Haven't you done enough?" His voice was raw and cracking.

"Vegard! Look, I'm sorry! I didn't think it would hurt you so much! Please, try to calm down. I'm sorry!" Bård spoke quickly now that he had Vegard's attention again.

"I don't care how sorry you are. How do you think it felt having to talk about it on tv? Do you have any idea? And what do you think mom and dad will say?" Vegard struggled to calm himself down, but the hurt in his voice was evident.

Bård sighed dejectedly. "I really am sorry, Vegard. I just didn't think..."

"You don't think. That's exactly the problem with you. You don't think about consequences. A prank!" Vegard groaned exasperatedly. "The program will be aired tomorrow. I still have to call mom and dad and try to explain the damn thing... fuck, Bård!"

"Do you want me to call them for you? I can do it," Bård offered, desperately grabbing for something to make this mess better.

"No! It's my problem now. You've done enough." Vegard was suddenly feeling very tired of everything. "But you know, the thing that really hurts me, more than anything else, is why you were so eager to break your promise to me. Does this mean I can't trust you anymore?" His voice was small and flat.

This hit Bård right in the gut. Broken a promise, that was what he had done. Broken a trust. That hurt. He hadn't thought of that at the time, it had just felt like a hillarious prank to make Vegard squirm on tv. But now, seeing the way Vegard reacted and finally understanding how much he had hurt him.... Bård swallowed heavily.

"I am really, really sorry, Vegard," he said quietly. "You're right, I didn't think. I never meant to break your trust in me... I just didn't realize how important this was to you. I thought it was just a little thing... I don't know what to say, really. I wish this had never happened."

"I wish that too," Vegard sighed. "But it's too late now. What's done is done, and we have to face the music. You too."

"I know," Bård whispered, "but I want you to know that you can still trust me. I'll never do such a thing again."

"Trust needs to be earned," was all Vegard replied. "I'm weary to my bones. This has been a horrible day. Now I just want to sleep. Good night to you."

With that he hung up, leaving Bård to stare at the phone in his hand, and this time it was his turn to wipe angrily at his eyes.

 

**************

 

Vegard didn't get time to call his parents before the talk show was aired the next day - or rather, he kept postponing it because he didn't know what to say - and suddenly it was too late. The program with his confession had been on the air, and his parents had probably seen it - at least his mom, who used to diligently watch everything her sons turned up in. He decided he should drive over for a quick visit the next day to explain things, although the thought of talking to them face to face about this was daunting.

His parents were happy for this unexpected pleasure of seeing their busy son, and soon they were all seated around the coffee table. They chattered a bit about this and that, but Vegard couldn't relax. He was just waiting for a chance to change the topic, and was trying to read their faces to find out whether they had watched the program or not. Then suddenly, dad laughed and explained how he had visited a friend yesterday evening to watch their local sports team, because mom didn't like him hogging their tv with sports at home.

"So she had the tv to herself all night to watch her soaps," he laughed.

Hmm, so dad had definetely not seen the program, Vegard thought. But what about mom?

"Oh, that reminds me," mom suddenly said and stood up. "I have something for you."

She went over to the cupboard and pulled out a drawer, taking out something Vegard couldn't see and then returned to the table and sat down.

"Can you tell me why I found THIS behind the old dresser yesterday?" she asked in a serious voice and put something on the table.

It was an dirty, wrinkled piece of pink paper in a worn plastic pocket. It had a couple of stamps on it, and a faded photo of a small, dark haired boy. Above the photo it said BUSSKORT in black letters.

Vegard stared at the bus card in shock. He could feel all the blood draining from his face as he turned ghostly pale. Suddenly he was nine years again, and he was about to get yelled at. All the anxiety the little boy had felt that day so long ago, hit him like a sledge hammer, and his stomach knotted painfully

"I watched the talkshow yesterday," mom explained. "So I got the idea to pull the old, heavy dresser out from the wall to look behind it. You always used to throw your jacket over it instead of hanging it up. And there it was, pressed up against the wall. Fallen out of your pocket."

Both men stared first at mom, then at the thing on the table. Dad wordlessly reached out and picked up the buss pass, looking at it. His expression gradually changed from incredulity to shock and anger as he realized what this was. Slowly he turned towards his son with a stern look.

Vegard was unable to stop staring at the pink card in his father's hand. Surely he was expected to say something... he swallowed heavily, opened and closed his mouth and made some stuttering noises. But his breath got caught in his throat and he couldn't get a word out.

"I thought this was stolen from you?" dad said finally, in a low voice. "At least that's what you told the police."

Vegard could hear his own pulse pounding in his ears. The panic was right beneath the surface, but he straightened his back. He wasn't a terrified little boy anymore, he told himself. He was a grown man. He could face this.

Vegard drew a long, shuddering breath.

"Yes, that's what I told the police," he said in a slightly trembling voice. "I lied."

"So you lied to the police, to the school and the headmaster, everybody involved! But worst of all, you lied to us, your parents. You made a fool of us all!" Dad's voice was getting angry. "Why?"

"Because I was terrified! I didn't dare to say I had lost it because I knew you would get angry - just like you're doing now - and mom kept asking me about it, and then the lie just popped up in my head, and I thought it would save my ass."

Vegard looked from dad to mom, hoping for some help, but mom said nothing. Sighing heavily, he looked down at his hands, trying to gather strength to continue.

"And then the lie just started snowballing, and I couldn't stop it anymore. It was you grown-ups who involved the headmaster and the police, and it got totally out of control, and I was just a little boy! It was killing me!" He looked up at dad with all the grief of the nine-year-old shining in his eyes.

Dad looked at his grown-up son who was staring at him with tears in his eyes, and recognized his pain. He nodded slowly.

"I remember how devastated you were. We thought you were traumatized, but in reality it must have been because of the pressure you were under to maintain your lie. It was fear," he said with realization in his voice.

"It was," Vegard aknowledged. "I had never felt such anxiety in all my life. It still pains me to this day. But I think it has also shaped me, because it's kept me from ever telling lies again. I learned a harsh lesson."

"Then it had a purpose," mom added. "When I saw you telling this story on the talkshow, I first felt angry because you had lied to us. But then I saw how it pained you to talk about it, and I understood that you had already received your punishment long ago."

Vegard reached out for his teacup and took a sip. His breathing was still shaky, but the worst seemed to be over now... he hoped.

"But there is something that still hurts me," mom continued. "Why did you never come clean to us about it later, when you grew up? Why did you let it continue to fester and pain you?"

Slowly, Vegard shook his head. He didn't even know himself. The whole thing had him feeling so utterly ashamed that all he wanted to do was to bury it deep down inside again, and never think about it ever again.

"I don't know," he said wearily, holding his hands around the teacup. The gentle warmth on his fingers felt soothing and calming. "Obviously Bård made that decision for me." His voice was bitter.

For the first time during the conversation, mom smiled. "I think he's done you a favour, even though it doesn't feel that way for you yet."

"Not when he forced me to come clean on national television he didn't," Vegard grumbled.

"I'm sure you can get him back," mom chuckled. "You boys know so much about each other, I'm sure you know a secret or two you can use."

Vegard stared at mom and slowly broke into a big smile. "Now that's an idea!" he said eagerly. "I've got so much on that guy! You are hereby warned in advance."

Even dad smiled now. "Now THAT is a show I would like to watch!"

 

 

 


End file.
